For most parents, summertime means having a child on you or very close to you from dusk till dawn. From running your kids to day camps to soccer practice or from the beach to a sleepover, by the end of the day all you want to do is NOTHING. It’s easy to feel run down and exhausted from the grind of a busy summer schedule, but remember; it’s important to find time not only for yourself but also for that special someone in your life. Here are some simple ways to heat up your summer romance with your better half.
Find the right balance
Whether you work full time or manage your kids and home, by the end of the day, it’s hard not to immediately put on your jammies, plop down on the couch and zone out for a bit. Don't get me wrong, we all need and deserve time to ourselves where we’re not taking care of or giving to someone else. As long as your partner is next to you while surfing through the DVR selection, you are still technically together, right? Yes and No. It can be easy to fall into the routine of being physically next to each other without actually connecting emotionally. Finding the right balance between “you time” and “us time” can prove to be challenging. With a little bit of focus and creativity, you can do both and do both well!
A wise woman once told me “You cannot give all to another person if you do not give all to yourself.” When we love ourselves and take care of ourselves, we are that much better equipped to do so for the ones we love. Take that time for yourself daily. Whether it is an early morning run, 30 minutes of your favorite cooking show or an evening bubble bath, carve out this space in the day for you. Let your partner know your plan and encourage them to find their “me moment” in their day. Now that you both have had a moment to do you, it's time to get creative and focus on the “us."
Variety is the Spice of Life
Intimacy comes in all forms and romance is not always wine and roses. I have friends who are lucky enough to have date night every single week. While it is critical to the success of their marriage, it's always the same old dinner and a movie. What happened to courting each other? Of course it’s awesome to see a non-animated R-rated movie every once in awhile, but spicing things up can be awesome too!
Try some of these ideas on for size:
- Art Gallery - Most art galleries have free openings on the first Thursdays of the month. Check out your area for the free showings, get dolled up and take in a little culture!
- Music in the Park - During the summers, there are always small concerts in the park series. Pack a picnic and your kid’s LilyPad playmat and snuggle up with your sweetie for a night of live music.
- Drive-In Movie - I know, I know. Do these even exist anymore? You’d be surprised they are making a comeback. Do a little Googling and see if there might just be one in your area and then travel back in time and get close to each other.
- Backyard Happy Hour - One of the best parts of summer is the beautiful warm evenings. After the kids go down, throw together a cheese plate, pop a bottle of wine, turn on the tunes and enjoy the summer night with the one you love.
- Get physical - Get out and get those endorphins going with a hike or a trip to the gym together!
- Movie Night at Home - On a budget? Move around some furniture in the living room or bedroom, dim the lights, grab a bottle of wine or dessert, take the kids’ Pebble Loungers from the playroom and hold hands with your honey while watching the latest flick in your Home Theatre!
- Candlelight Dinner a La Casa - Instead of eating dinner with the kids one night, make them something easy and order delivery for the two of you. Once the kids are down, set up the dining table with some candles, play some music and go on a date - at home! The joy of having someone else cook and most importantly, NO DISHES!
You Get What You Give
It feels like after all the energy we put into our kids and their busy schedules, there isn’t anything left for ourselves, let alone our spouses. It’s easy to get into a rut, especially when you both are burnt out. So why is it important to prioritize keeping your love alive? Well, we aren’t experts but we can say not making your partner a priority can have long-lasting negative effects on your relationship. It doesn't have to be a production. Even the smallest acts of kindness can speak volumes. A note on the bathroom mirror, calling to say you’re thinking about them or a quick text to say “I love you” let your spouse know you care.
The effort is worth the results. It’s important not to lose the foundation that brought you together in the first place. You’ll feel better. They will feel better. Together, you will feel like a team and your relationship will continue to grow. Nothing is more important than teaching and showing your kids what a healthy, balanced and loving relationship is. They will grow up knowing their parents made time for each other and will look to do the same in their adult relationships.